From a Teen’s Perspective: (Rightly) crashing into adulthood

It’s official: I’m an adult. As of last Wednesday, I can vote, buy a lottery ticket, and, as my mom loves to mention, go to “real jail.”

Maybe I’m just a weirdo, but I usually get really sad on my birthday every year for no apparent reason. Feeling a sense of loss (stemming from youth, innocence, or just plain old hormones) is as predictable as getting my favorite carrot cake.

But on this last birthday — the birthday — the most important epochal shift I will ever experience, I found no sadness in my heart or grave apprehension in my disposition.

In fact, the first thing I felt was, “I’m ready.” Ready for change, for freedom, for adulthood in all its terrifying and exhilarating possibilities.

Yet immediately after my internal declaration, my mind asked, “How in the ever-loving world could you be ready?” I am a naïve high-schooler with high-strung anxiety and whose major “life skills” consist of knowing how to order pizza and pump gas (even though it once took me five minutes to realize I needed to select a fuel type before pumping). I can’t even tie a tie, for Pete’s sake!

It feels like I’m crashing into adulthood, and yet there’s something oddly charming about being thrown into the deep end and forced to swim.

I thought long and hard about why I didn’t fear this new chapter of my life, and I realized that for the first time, I didn’t seem to care what my brain thought. Somehow I remained steadfast in my belief that I could handle adulthood. And then I realized: I’m not scared of adulthood because I know there’s no magic recipe.

No one “knows” how to be an adult. There’s no playbook, and there’s certainly no objective metrics of “success.” You can’t win at being an adult but, on the flipside, that also means you can’t fail.

Your life doesn’t suddenly reset the second you turn 18. You remain a work-in-progress forever. And while that may sound daunting, accepting it is quite liberating. Adulthood is all about adjustments: maintaining a work-life balance, spending vs. saving, etc. etc.

Yes, I have much to learn about being an adult, and there will be plenty of uncomfortable moments throughout the journey. But I know that I’m not alone — everyone is figuring out how to “adult,” as well.

I have courage and a willingness to face challenges. I feel prepared for adulthood because I’m okay with not being prepared for everything.

I have a wonderful family, passionate goals, and a positive attitude. At the end of the day, what more could I possibly need?

Got any topics you want me to cover? Email dylanclarklanier@gmail.com with your requests!

Dylan Lanier is a senior at Menlo-Atherton High School; his column appears weekly

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